Yesterday was my birthday.
Today would have been my daughter Staci’s 47th. But I buried her just a couple
days after her first. Many would say, “how sad.” And I did for a while because I felt the loss, the emptiness. And even now, I can get teary-eyed when I think of her. But I believed then and even more now that nothing sneaks up on God and for His glory, He had His reasons. Before she was even born, He planned her days (about 370 of them) according to His will (Ps. 139:16).
If you read my post on August 4, you’ll see this was the first of two children God took home. My wife and I certainly had grief and cried many tears over their departures. But over the years, our sadness has turned to joy knowing we’ll see them both again when God calls our number.
There is a misconception
that up to 80% of marriages end in divorce after the loss of a child. That number is simply not true. In a 2006 study commissioned by The Compassionate Friends, parental divorce following the death of a child was found to be around 16%. The findings were consistent with an earlier study conducted by the group that showed equally low divorce rates among bereaved parents. Interestingly, less than half of those who were divorced following the death of their child (only about 7%) felt that the death had contributed to the disintegration of the marriage. Other factors had more impact on the dissolution.
For my wife and me, the only thing we had to rely on was our faith in God and trusting His Word that He didn’t make a mistake or “didn’t see that one coming.” Whatever the percentage, the grief is real, the coping challenges are real, and even anger at fate, or bad luck, or God who “let it happen.” But this is a site for good news not Eeyore-speak.
It’s so easy for us
to focus primarily on what we can see and know empirically. Spoiler alert: all that will burn up. The invisible world that we can’t see with our eyes is what will last forever. That being the case, we probably should spend more time learning about it, understanding it, and embracing the hope that transcends all the shiny objects of this world. How do we do that? Glad you asked.
Of all the perhaps billions of books in the world, there is ONLY ONE that fulfills the truth of learning, understanding, and hope that we need to survive: The Bible, God’s eternal Word. If you don’t have one, get one. The sooner the better. Make sure it’s a “translation” not just a “paraphrase.” My favorite is the New American Standard – Revised Edition, but there are other good ones too. If you already have a Bible, are you reading it every day? Memorizing meaningful passages? Applying it to daily living?
The rest of this website
is committed to spreading God’s Word and encouraging a strong relationship with the One who died to make our future in heaven possible. Prowl around the “Christ in Men” tab, scroll down and read some of the character qualities exampled for us by Jesus Himself. It’s all good news available to anyone with a humble heart. If you don’t know Jesus and want to, check out our “Steps to Salvation” page for a look at God’s perspective relating to you.