Crush or Edify

Words have meanings. Often it requires context because the same word can mean more than one thing, especially after modern slang has its go at it. Consider the word “bad.” In my younger days, bad was what you called something you really liked. Confusing? Yes. Unmanageable? No. The Bible has a lot to say about the words that come out of our mouths. Our tongue is said to be “a fire” (Jas. 3:6). From our mouths come both blessing and cursing (Jas. 3:10). Paul cautions us about releasing “unwholesome words” (Eph. 4:29). Jesus said, “…the mouth speaks out of that which fills the heart” (Matt. 12:34b).

The full picture

of the above verse from Ephesians 4:29 says, “Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear.” When you look at these verses side by side you can see that our mouths and tongues are powerful for edification, comfort, encouragement, praise and more. But they can also be like the viper with poison that can crush in its vitriol, bitterness, hatred (Ps. 140:3).

I remember a little ditty from elementary school days when unkind names were hurled, “Sticks and stones will break my bones, but names will never hurt me.” That’s pure hogwash. Names called in anger, meanness, superiority can crush our spirits; they can have devastating consequences years into our futures.

Considering the context

of words spoken, James asks the question, “Does a fountain send out from the same opening both fresh and bitter water?” (Jas.3:11). It’s rhetoric. The answer is obviously no. But Jesus’ words (para. 1) convict us of this very thing. Why? How is it possible to bless and curse from the same mouth? The answer is easy. The correction, not so much. The simple answer is we still sin. Our hearts are not as pure as we’d like to think, not as pure as we’d like others to think. And we have an enemy who delights in pushing just the right button to enable the flow.

So what’s the solution? The first step is to humbly recognize we have this problem. Next, we must want to change. Until that happens, no amount of Bible reading, verse memorizing, or counseling will change the output. Unless we realize that our unkind, angry, hurtful words are sins that nailed Jesus to the cross, we will continue pounding the nails. But don’t lose heart. Our walk of faith is based on the fact that all our sins were forgiven at the cross; past, present, and future. Go to God in prayer, confess that your heart isn’t filled with “the right stuff.”

Self-examination is a good next step.

Ask yourself why you feel the need to put others down. Are you struggling with feelings of insecurity? Striking out at others may make us feel good for a moment, but it doesn’t deal with the underlying issue. Ask, “Is my confidence in the flesh?” The answer is likely to be yes. As believers in Jesus Christ, our worth is not based on anything we do. We are valuable because God said we are, and Jesus gave His life to prove it. He loves us in spite of our warts. When we get our arms around that truth, it’ll be easier to obey the command, “…regard one another as more important than yourselves” (Phil. 2:3b). Look at that verse again. It doesn’t say others ARE more important. But if we consider them in that way, then the things coming out of our mouth will edify (enlighten, inspire) our hearers.

Today, there is so much of the other kind of speech everywhere we turn. Very little in the media or public arena edifies anybody. God’s people are called to be different. Let’s start in our own home and commit to only speaking words that edify our spouse, our children, and anybody else who passes our doorway. Maybe it’ll catch on.